Random Rasslin Ramblings 3: WCW Slamboree 1998
With help from twitter suggestions and the fruit machine, this was the pay-per-view I got to review for the third RRR. Like I said last time I reviewed WCW, I've never really seen much. However, going through this show, I noticed that I have actually seen quite a few clips from this PPV, which I'll obviously get into later. Since I have nothing else to add, from Worcester, Massachusetts (the worst town name in America for pronunciation purposes), it's Slamboree 1998!
Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan are on commentary, and they make quick mention of the possibility of Scott Hall no-showing tonight's Tag Team Championship match (which is the main event). Heenan notes that Nash has promised Hall's going to be there. They also recap Eric Bischoff reading a letter on Thunder from "Vince McMahon's attorney". It is now that I realize that HOLY SHIT THIS IS THE SHOW WITH THE MCMAHON VS BISCHOFF MATCH.
Outside, Bischoff's head of security stands and waits with a backstage pass for Vinny Mac. He's amongst some fans, and he tries to push a very anti-WWF agenda. Hilariously, one of these fans is shown on camera wearing an Austin 3:16 shirt.
WCW Television Title Match - Chris Benoit vs Fit Finlay (c)
Finally, we reach the opening match. I expect nothing but STIFFNESS, and my wishes are granted early on as Benoit leathers Finlay with a chop. But they change up the pace, trading holds while Schiavone explains why they refer to Finlay as "Fit". Apparently it's because he's so adept at other athletic endeavors. There's a short pinning sequence and a little mat wrestling, and the crowd begins to chant "Finlay sucks". It's incredible a guy with a mullet like Benoit's got so over. Speaking of Benoit, he connects with more chops in the corner. MY chest is turning red. Finlay comes back, however, and grounds Benoit on the outside with a hard clothesline. This is when the match gets sloooooooooow.
Finlay just keeps Benoit on the mat, but eventually a chinlock is countered into an electric chair. Unfortunately, Finlay stays on the offensive. The pace slows back down, and Finlay grabs more holds. On the outside, Finlay grabs a chair, but Benoit smacks him with said chair. Nick Patrick doesn't disqualify Benoit for blatant steel chair use. Not a fan of that. A suicide dive by Benoit is countered with a chair shot. Also not a DQ. As much as I hate the ignorant officiating, at least I finally know where Jericho and Benoit got the idea for that Royal Rumble 2001 spot now!
Benoit goes for the triple German Suplexes, but the second one is countered as Finlay runs him throat-first into the top rope. Finlay goes back on the advantage, until a short-arm lariat attempt is reversed into the Crossface. Finlay is able to get to the ropes, though. Benoit goes up top for the Headbutt, but Booker T comes out and they argue as he steps off the top rope and to the floor. During the argument, Finlay hits Benoit with a baseball slide. They exchange strikes in the ring, but Finlay takes over and plants Benoit with a jumping Tombstone for the victory. The match wasn't too bad, but it was pitifully slow at times. Also, quite selfishly, I would've preferred it to be more stiff.
Brian Adams w/ Vincent vs Lex Luger
I heard the nWo theme and got really excited. Then Brian Adams and Vincent came out. Fuck this. Luger is apparently defending the honor of Rick Steiner, who was injured at the hands of Scott Steiner and the nWo. Early on, Luger hits a Coconut Crush on Vincent and Adams. A sequence of slow, awful moves ensues, with Luger mainly focusing on Adams' shoulder due to the nWo's attack causing an injury on Rick Steiner's shoulder. Cool story, I suppose. Lex essentially kicks the living shit out of Adams for two or three minutes. More bad moves to the shoulder, and eventually Adams works himself back into the match via a distraction by Vincent. Adams hits a pretty awesome piledriver, but Luger's bad selling doesn't do the moves any favors. They go back-and-forth again, and it culminates in a woeful double clothesline spot.
Vincent is knocked off the apron, and Adams taps out to a Torture Rack almost out of nowhere. This is one of the worst matches I've ever had the displeasure of viewing, but still not the worst match I've ever seen Brian Adams involved in. So congratulations to you, Mr. Adams.
Saturn Promo
Sitting by himself in a dark room, Saturn says there'll be no gauntlet match tonight (apparently The Flock is supposed to face Goldberg for the US Title?), and he tells The Flock that if they have an issue with it, they know where to find him. He says that ever since he came to WCW under Raven's wing, it's been all about Raven. "What about Saturn?" he says. He then claims that he'll take out Goldberg, and not even Raven can stop him. This would have come off better if Saturn didn't have such a silly voice, but it was still pretty cool.
Cruiserweight Battle Royal
It starts with my favorite wrestler of all time, Chris Jericho, cutting a promo. He runs down fucking EVERYBODY. I guess whoever wins gets a shot at Jericho's Cruiserweight Title. Y2J being considered a cruiserweight is super weird. To make things even better, Jericho does all the wrestlers introductions. Highlights include:
"From El Paso, Mexico... he's the scourge of the illustrious Guerrero family, Chavo Guerrero Jr.!"
"From selling chimichangas on the streets to WCW, CICLOPE!"
"He can't afford a mask so he's wearing paint, DAMIEN!"
"His name is Kidman, and Kidman, I've got some calamine lotion for you after the show."
"This guy is Silver King, if he wins twelve more matches in WCW he'll be upgraded to Golden King."
Utter chaos ensues, because battle royal. I feel as though it is worth noting on its own that MARTY GOD DAMN JANNETTY is in this match. Evan Karagias is eliminated first, but did any of the other fourteen people in this match get mentioned in Madusa's Hall of Fame speech? That's what I thought. 3 Count forever. Nothing interesting happens, as is a battle royal tradition. This is mostly due to the fact that there's too many people in the ring, and therefore no room for lucha moves. The good thing about battle royals is that it gives me a good opportunity to make observations about lower-card wrestlers. For instance, I noticed that Lenny Lane looks like what would happen if somebody deflated Lex Luger's muscles.
As more eliminations occur, so do more lucha moves and the action picks up. The final five in the match are Chavo Guerrero, Juventud Guerrera, Psicosis, Kidman, and Ciclope. Chavo is eliminated, and shortly thereafter Psicosis eliminates himself with a missed crossbody. Juventud gets rid of Kidman, but then eliminates himself as Ciclope unmasks to reveal DEAN MALENKO! This is one of the clips that I had seen on YouTube before, and the pop never gets quieter. Shockingly, the crowd in Worcester of all places was rabid all night, as Jericho almost shits himself and the Cruiserweight Title match immediately gets underway.
WCW Cruiserweight Title Match - Chris Jericho (c) vs Dean Malenko
House of fire to start by Malenko, which leads into a pretty good wrestling sequence, but it ends abruptly with a few hard strikes by Malenko. Juvi stays at ringside to cheer for Malenko, and the commentators make note of it. Anything going on there....?
Malenko wrestling in Ciclope gear but no mask for this long looks hilariously absurd. Jericho takes control and taunts the crowd, yelling "THIS IS A CONSPIRACY" to rile up the sea of humanity, who oblige him with heavy boos and a "Jericho sucks" chant. Y2J gets a really close nearfall with the classic cocky pin, while the announcers continue to play up Juventud staying at ringside as a show of respect for Malenko. Definitely no shenanigans...
Fireman's Carry Gutbuster off the top rope by Malenko looks AMAZING. Off that move, he puts in the Texas Cloverleaf. I absolutely adore that move. Jericho gets dragged away from the ropes, and taps out. Shockingly, there is no Juventud swerve, as Malenko points to the heavens for his deceased father. Good wrestling, but the match shouldn't have gone on so long with Malenko in Ciclope gear AFTER a big return and a battle royal. Still, the match itself was stellar.
Backstage, the "Vinny Mac Cam" shows us a limousine arriving at the building. They speculate that it's Vince, and they also fire a shot at Jim Ross.
Bowery Death Cage Match - Diamond Dallas Page vs Raven
So the idea of this match is that it's basically a last man standing match inside of a roofed cage. Not a hell in a cell though, because the cage is tight to the ring. There are also trash cans on each post that are full of weapons. Damn, Raven was the coolest. I wish WWE would have done more with him. I'm pretty excited for this match just on paper on account of how much of a fan I am of both these guys. DDP controls a slugfest, but gets tossed face-first into one of the trash cans in the corner. Raven pulls down one of these cans and dumps out the weapons. He then does the same with another can, littering the mat with weapons before whiffing on a bullrope shot. DDP takes hold of the rope and wraps it around Raven's neck, then uses it to throw him into the cage. Apparently this bullrope came into play at Spring Stampede. Hooray for continuity!
DDP strings the rope through the top of the cage and essentially hangs Raven with it. No need for that, to be honest, as Raven gets up at a count of eight. DDP grabs hold of a VCR and smashes it over Raven's head. This prompts Bobby Heenan to make multiple VCR-related jokes. Raven kicks DDP into a trash can, and the back of his head smashes a dent in it. This leads to a cavalcade of weapon attacks by Raven, but he just can't keep DDP down for the count. The official is driven into the trash can, and everybody's out. Not sure why there's a need for a ref bump in a no holds barred match, though. DDP catches Raven with a drop-toehold onto a steel chair, which is one of Raven's own moves.
At this point, The Flock rushes out and assaults members of the riot squad that Raven entered with. Then The Flock opens the cage door with bolt cutters. Out from under the ring comes Van Hammer, who attacks The Flock with a stop sign. The cage door is still open as DDP unloads with right hands on Raven in the corner. The riot squad enters the cage and assaults DDP, but they remove their helmets to reveal that they are Kidman and Horace Boulder! DDP gives Boulder the Diamond Cutter, and one for Kidman as well who was hanging on the top of the cage. Raven clocks DDP with a fire extinguisher, then an Evenflow that the camera misses completely. The ref recovers and DDP gets up at eight. They trade right hands, but a low blow and a Diamond Cutter by RAVEN drop DDP!
Page recovers at nine, and gets Raven out of nowhere with the Diamond Cutter! With both men down, DDP is able to get to his feet at nine, picking up the victory. Raven probably should've won with all the help he received, but it was super hectic and a lot of fun. After the match, a riot squad member handcuffs all the Flock members to the cage, and reveals himself to be Mortis after throwing Raven into the cage and handcuffing him to it. Mortis then unmasks for the first time. WHOOOO BETTA DEN KANYOOOOOON??? Kanyon then crushes a defenseless Raven with an unprotected chair shot to the head. I mean he absolutely blasts him. It was hard to watch.
We come back to the Vinny Mac cam. They're really milking this joke for more than it's worth now. Security has a sheet with pictures of people to look out for. Included are McMahon, Austin and DX. It's taking them a while to clean up after the chaotic cage match, so they stall and talk about the night's events thus far.
Ultimo Dragon vs Eddy Guerrero w/ Chavo Guerrero Jr.
The story coming into this match is that if Ultimo Dragon wins, Chavo gets to stop being Eddy's bitch. I expect a Chavo swerve, which wouldn't make sense. But it's WCW so oh well. They kick it off with an awesome wrestling sequence, which is to be expected from two wrestlers of their caliber. It's fast and smooth. Eddy ducks the rapid fire kicks and drops Dragon with a dropkick. Eddy slows it down a little now, being that he is the heel. But that only lasts so long, as Ultimo gets the match back to the fast action. No complaints. Eddy stalls as Ultimo frustrates him with more kicks and a half crab. Ultimo then switches the half crab to an Indian Deathlock as my "favorite wrestling moves" siren is blaring.
Ultimo is on the receiving end of a thumb to the eye, and loses his grip on the match. Eddy hits a gigantic clothesline and a stiff kick to the spine. He looks absolutely pissed and it couldn't be better. Ultimo is tossed to the floor, then whipped into the guard rail and choked with a TV cable. Chavo and Little Naitch yell at Eddy to cut the shit. Eddy smacks Chavo around as a result, then drags Dragon BY THE MASK back into the ring. Little things like that are what make Eddy the best. I would be remiss to just talk about the in-ring action in a match where the story is so compelling on its own. The dynamic between Chavo managing Eddy but cheering for Ultimo Dragon to win makes for an interesting story, and one where I want to know what might come of it.
Ultimo gets more aggressive and connects with a moonsault for two. Tornado DDT caps a nice exchange in favor of Eddy. That's Chavo's move, which is mentioned on commentary. Eddy misses a Frog Splash, and Ultimo quickly jumps into La Magistral for two. Eddy manages to catch Ultimo out of an asai moonsault, but Ultimo turns it into a Dragon Sleeper. Eddy is able to counter yet again, trying for a rope-assisted pin this time, but Chavo throws his legs off the ropes. Eddy gets in his face. Eddy slaps his nephew around, and ducks a spinning heel kick by Ultimo, who clobbers Chavo. Brainbuster and Frog Splash by Eddy puts Ultimo Dragon away.
Chavo goes berserk after the match, and attacks Ultimo. Called it. It makes sense with Eddy winning, though. Eddy ends up telling Chavo to calm down, and offers his chin to his nephew. Chavo can't bring himself to hit family, and Eddy, being the asshole he is, forces Chavo to kiss him on the cheek rather than punch him there.
They show a locker room prepared for Vincent Kennedy McMahon as the last match exits the ring.
United States Title Match - Goldberg (c) vs Saturn
At this point, Goldberg is 87-0. That's not too shabby. Unfortunately, though, he did not utilize his proper entrance, with the security escort and walk to the ring. It's crazy just how over Goldberg is. It's pointed out by Tony Schiavone that almost 80% of fan posters at this event are Goldberg signs, and he might not be wrong. It's hard to believe that a midcard champion can be the most over person on the roster, but Goldberg had to have been at least damn close. I guess I never gave Saturn enough credit, because he was far more muscled up than I remembered him being. Goldberg powers Saturn around, so Saturn tries some wrestling holds to counteract the size and strength advantage. Goldberg thwarts Saturn's plans, though, with a very impressive Gorilla Press Powerslam. He follows it up with a regular Gorilla Press Slam, and then a bad-looking clothesline.
Saturn rolls to the outside and cuts off Goldberg as they get back in. Saturn lays into Goldberg with strikes in teh corner, but then makes the mistake of slapping him across the face. This simply infuriates Goldberg. However, Saturn stays on top, driving Goldberg shoulder-first into the ringpost, He capitalizes on Goldberg's injured shoulder with an amazing spinning heel kick off the top rope, and tries to keep him on the mat with various holds, but Goldberg basically no sells all that stuff. Saturn doesn't lose the advantage though, as he gets in a good amount of offense, most notably a beautiful overhead exploder suplex.
Saturn gets a steel chair, and uses it to springboard himself into a dropkick to Goldberg's lower back. He tries again, and gets the absolute shit Speared out of him. After that, the Jackhammer and pinfall are academic. One of the better Goldberg matches I've ever seen, even if it was mostly Saturn putting in the work. Nothing much to complain about.
Raven cuts a cool promo, shitting on American traditions to promote the Great American Bash.
Eric Bischoff vs Vince McMahon
Michael Buffer does the ring announcing for this match, which is insane when you realize how much he charges per appearance. It's a shitload. Buffer lists Bischoff's various accomplishments, and obviously, McMahon doesn't come out. They declare Bischoff winner by forfeit. It was a pretty good idea in theory to poke fun at WWF, but the whole thing was super drawn out and made into more of an event than it needed to be.
"Macho Man" Randy Savage vs Bret "The Hitman" Hart
First and foremost, fuck everything about Bret Hart's WCW theme. Kill it with acid. Rowdy Roddy Piper comes out after Bret, and apparently he's the referee! I love the nWo theme and everything, but Macho Man coming out to anything other than Pomp and Circumstance just feels wrong, no matter how cool he looks in the Wolfpac red and black. Bret and Piper have a shoving match early, as Savage dominates the action despite not doing anything special. Bret takes over now, but it's still just basic offense. Bret misses with the steel steps on the outside, then gets whipped into them by Macho Man. They brawl through the crowd, as Piper continues to yell that he'll let them fight. There's a major problem here, as there isn't a path through the crowd like they always had in WWF. So not only can they not really do anything in their brawl, the cameras can't distinguish them from the moshpit of fans they're stuck in.
It doesn't take long before they return from the crowd, probably realizing it was a bad idea. Bret goes after Macho Man's bad knee for the first time in the match with stomps and elbows. Tony Schiavone mentions that Scott Hall has just arrived to the building while Bret jumps on Macho Man's injured leg. Piper gets physical with Hart to pull him off Savage in the corner, but Bret just goes right back to dissecting the leg. Savage kicks out of a wicked piledriver, and Hart gets in Piper's face to complain about a slow count. Hart delays before going for the cover off a DDT, and Savage kicks out at two yet again. Bret goes up to, of course, Bret's rope, but nobody's home for the elbow drop.
Macho Man limps around, rallying with a snap suplex for two. He heads up top for the Macho Elbow, and connects! He grabs his knee and rolls around before pinning for a very close nearfall. Bret hits a headbutt to the gut and locks in the Sharpshooter. Miss Elizabeth runs out! This distraction helps Macho Man put in a Sharpshooter of his own! Bret is able to get to the ropes, as Elizabeth comes in and shoves Piper for whatever reason. Then, Savage comes over and shoves Piper for arguing with Elizabeth. Hart gets Savage with a low blow while Piper is dealing with Elizabeth, and clocks Piper. Macho Man confiscates a foreign object from Bret that he used to hit Piper, but Hollywood Hogan comes out and assaults Macho Man's knee!
Another Sharpshooter is applied, as Piper finds the foreign object in Savage's hand. Piper disqualifies him, and Bret Hart picks up the victory. This was a complete mess, and not a very entertaining one. Too much stuff that commentary didn't bother explaining, and just too much stuff in general.
WCW Tag Team Title Match - The Outsiders w/ Dusty Rhodes (c) vs Sting and The Giant
Not sure how they ended up here, but Sting is teaming with nWo Hollywood's Giant. Wolfpac attire, but no Wolfpac theme for Hall and Nash. Regardless, they are the coolest tag team ever. Hall cuts a promo, and the crowd pops when he goes "Hey, yo". He asks the fans if they're here to see Dubya See Dubya, and they boo. He then asks if they're here to see the nWo. They cheer loudly. It's weird that despite The Giant being heel and The Outsiders being babyfaces, they came out to the same entrance theme. The idea being played up at commentary is that should Giant and Sting win the titles, Sting will have to decide whether or not to join nWo Hollywood.
Hall starts in the ring with Sting, and Sting takes a toothpick to the face. Hall hits a decent Chokeslam, and stomps around like Frankenstein to mock The Giant on the apron. Nash comes in to stop the Scorpion Deathlock, and Sting beats up both Outsiders. Hall tags in Nash as a response to Sting tagging in The Giant, and they go at it. Nash gains the advantage on The Giant, and goes for a Jackknife that's countered. Nash continues to beat him down, though. A big corner clothesline and a boot by Giant, who then does the Hogan hand-to-ear taunt.
There's three faces in this match, so the crowd doesn't really know what to do when Sting's in the ring with one of The Outsiders. Sting gets clobbered with a big boot by Nash, who tags in Hall. Hall goes to work on Sting, and catches him out of a crossbody to connect with the Fallaway Slam. They continue to double team Sting, and Hall gives Giant the spooky fingers taunt. Nash crotch chops towards The Giant before beating on Sting in the corner, infuriating the big man on the outside. Hall puts Sting in an abdominal stretch and, as the heel in this situation, holds hands with Nash for leverage. Sting is stuck in the stretch for a LONG time, but counters out eventually with a hip toss followed by an elbow drop that doesn't hit.
Hall tags in Big Sexy, who drops Sting with a leaping Sidewalk Slam for two. Sting lunges towards his corner for the tag, but he's caught in a bear hug. After letting the arm drop twice, Sting gets out of the bear hug with headbutts and a forehead bite, tagging in The Giant. It is now that I realize that the booking seems backwards here, as babyface Sting makes the hot tag to the only heel in the whole match. Either way, The Giant pummels Big Kev, and hits him with a Hollywood Hogan leg drop for a nearfall. The Giant drops the strap on his singlet before heading up to the top rope. He leaps off with a Superfly Splash, but Nash is able to avoid it and Giant hits the mat with thunderous impact. Dusty slides one of the tag belts into the ring and goes to distract the referee, while Nash drops his own straps. Hall sneaks in the ring and grabs the belt Dusty left there, as Nash tries to hoist The Giant up for the Jackknife. Hall whacks Nash in the back with the belt, and Giant gets the three count!
Hall and Dusty go over to Giant and Sting to present them with the tag belts, as Hall has appeared to join nWo Hollywood. Sting doesn't move from the apron, staring a death gaze at Hall and The Giant with the tag belt resting on his shoulder, unsure what to make of the situation presented before him. The match was formulaic but in a good way, and it's always cool to see the tag belts main eventing a PPV. Maybe it's just me being jaded about WCW though, but I totally saw this swerve coming. There was no way a WCW PPV was ending with a clean finish.
Overall, the show was enjoyable and had a couple memorable moments. Outside of the Luger match, there's nothing I can point to and say to definitely avoid no matter what, but outside of Eddy/Ultimo there's also nothing I would really recommend as a must-watch. However, there was a lot more good than bad. There's a lot worse ways to spend three hours.
Bowery Death Cage Match - Diamond Dallas Page vs Raven
So the idea of this match is that it's basically a last man standing match inside of a roofed cage. Not a hell in a cell though, because the cage is tight to the ring. There are also trash cans on each post that are full of weapons. Damn, Raven was the coolest. I wish WWE would have done more with him. I'm pretty excited for this match just on paper on account of how much of a fan I am of both these guys. DDP controls a slugfest, but gets tossed face-first into one of the trash cans in the corner. Raven pulls down one of these cans and dumps out the weapons. He then does the same with another can, littering the mat with weapons before whiffing on a bullrope shot. DDP takes hold of the rope and wraps it around Raven's neck, then uses it to throw him into the cage. Apparently this bullrope came into play at Spring Stampede. Hooray for continuity!
DDP strings the rope through the top of the cage and essentially hangs Raven with it. No need for that, to be honest, as Raven gets up at a count of eight. DDP grabs hold of a VCR and smashes it over Raven's head. This prompts Bobby Heenan to make multiple VCR-related jokes. Raven kicks DDP into a trash can, and the back of his head smashes a dent in it. This leads to a cavalcade of weapon attacks by Raven, but he just can't keep DDP down for the count. The official is driven into the trash can, and everybody's out. Not sure why there's a need for a ref bump in a no holds barred match, though. DDP catches Raven with a drop-toehold onto a steel chair, which is one of Raven's own moves.
At this point, The Flock rushes out and assaults members of the riot squad that Raven entered with. Then The Flock opens the cage door with bolt cutters. Out from under the ring comes Van Hammer, who attacks The Flock with a stop sign. The cage door is still open as DDP unloads with right hands on Raven in the corner. The riot squad enters the cage and assaults DDP, but they remove their helmets to reveal that they are Kidman and Horace Boulder! DDP gives Boulder the Diamond Cutter, and one for Kidman as well who was hanging on the top of the cage. Raven clocks DDP with a fire extinguisher, then an Evenflow that the camera misses completely. The ref recovers and DDP gets up at eight. They trade right hands, but a low blow and a Diamond Cutter by RAVEN drop DDP!
Page recovers at nine, and gets Raven out of nowhere with the Diamond Cutter! With both men down, DDP is able to get to his feet at nine, picking up the victory. Raven probably should've won with all the help he received, but it was super hectic and a lot of fun. After the match, a riot squad member handcuffs all the Flock members to the cage, and reveals himself to be Mortis after throwing Raven into the cage and handcuffing him to it. Mortis then unmasks for the first time. WHOOOO BETTA DEN KANYOOOOOON??? Kanyon then crushes a defenseless Raven with an unprotected chair shot to the head. I mean he absolutely blasts him. It was hard to watch.
We come back to the Vinny Mac cam. They're really milking this joke for more than it's worth now. Security has a sheet with pictures of people to look out for. Included are McMahon, Austin and DX. It's taking them a while to clean up after the chaotic cage match, so they stall and talk about the night's events thus far.
Ultimo Dragon vs Eddy Guerrero w/ Chavo Guerrero Jr.
The story coming into this match is that if Ultimo Dragon wins, Chavo gets to stop being Eddy's bitch. I expect a Chavo swerve, which wouldn't make sense. But it's WCW so oh well. They kick it off with an awesome wrestling sequence, which is to be expected from two wrestlers of their caliber. It's fast and smooth. Eddy ducks the rapid fire kicks and drops Dragon with a dropkick. Eddy slows it down a little now, being that he is the heel. But that only lasts so long, as Ultimo gets the match back to the fast action. No complaints. Eddy stalls as Ultimo frustrates him with more kicks and a half crab. Ultimo then switches the half crab to an Indian Deathlock as my "favorite wrestling moves" siren is blaring.
Ultimo is on the receiving end of a thumb to the eye, and loses his grip on the match. Eddy hits a gigantic clothesline and a stiff kick to the spine. He looks absolutely pissed and it couldn't be better. Ultimo is tossed to the floor, then whipped into the guard rail and choked with a TV cable. Chavo and Little Naitch yell at Eddy to cut the shit. Eddy smacks Chavo around as a result, then drags Dragon BY THE MASK back into the ring. Little things like that are what make Eddy the best. I would be remiss to just talk about the in-ring action in a match where the story is so compelling on its own. The dynamic between Chavo managing Eddy but cheering for Ultimo Dragon to win makes for an interesting story, and one where I want to know what might come of it.
Ultimo gets more aggressive and connects with a moonsault for two. Tornado DDT caps a nice exchange in favor of Eddy. That's Chavo's move, which is mentioned on commentary. Eddy misses a Frog Splash, and Ultimo quickly jumps into La Magistral for two. Eddy manages to catch Ultimo out of an asai moonsault, but Ultimo turns it into a Dragon Sleeper. Eddy is able to counter yet again, trying for a rope-assisted pin this time, but Chavo throws his legs off the ropes. Eddy gets in his face. Eddy slaps his nephew around, and ducks a spinning heel kick by Ultimo, who clobbers Chavo. Brainbuster and Frog Splash by Eddy puts Ultimo Dragon away.
Chavo goes berserk after the match, and attacks Ultimo. Called it. It makes sense with Eddy winning, though. Eddy ends up telling Chavo to calm down, and offers his chin to his nephew. Chavo can't bring himself to hit family, and Eddy, being the asshole he is, forces Chavo to kiss him on the cheek rather than punch him there.
They show a locker room prepared for Vincent Kennedy McMahon as the last match exits the ring.
United States Title Match - Goldberg (c) vs Saturn
At this point, Goldberg is 87-0. That's not too shabby. Unfortunately, though, he did not utilize his proper entrance, with the security escort and walk to the ring. It's crazy just how over Goldberg is. It's pointed out by Tony Schiavone that almost 80% of fan posters at this event are Goldberg signs, and he might not be wrong. It's hard to believe that a midcard champion can be the most over person on the roster, but Goldberg had to have been at least damn close. I guess I never gave Saturn enough credit, because he was far more muscled up than I remembered him being. Goldberg powers Saturn around, so Saturn tries some wrestling holds to counteract the size and strength advantage. Goldberg thwarts Saturn's plans, though, with a very impressive Gorilla Press Powerslam. He follows it up with a regular Gorilla Press Slam, and then a bad-looking clothesline.
Saturn rolls to the outside and cuts off Goldberg as they get back in. Saturn lays into Goldberg with strikes in teh corner, but then makes the mistake of slapping him across the face. This simply infuriates Goldberg. However, Saturn stays on top, driving Goldberg shoulder-first into the ringpost, He capitalizes on Goldberg's injured shoulder with an amazing spinning heel kick off the top rope, and tries to keep him on the mat with various holds, but Goldberg basically no sells all that stuff. Saturn doesn't lose the advantage though, as he gets in a good amount of offense, most notably a beautiful overhead exploder suplex.
Saturn gets a steel chair, and uses it to springboard himself into a dropkick to Goldberg's lower back. He tries again, and gets the absolute shit Speared out of him. After that, the Jackhammer and pinfall are academic. One of the better Goldberg matches I've ever seen, even if it was mostly Saturn putting in the work. Nothing much to complain about.
Raven cuts a cool promo, shitting on American traditions to promote the Great American Bash.
Eric Bischoff vs Vince McMahon
Michael Buffer does the ring announcing for this match, which is insane when you realize how much he charges per appearance. It's a shitload. Buffer lists Bischoff's various accomplishments, and obviously, McMahon doesn't come out. They declare Bischoff winner by forfeit. It was a pretty good idea in theory to poke fun at WWF, but the whole thing was super drawn out and made into more of an event than it needed to be.
"Macho Man" Randy Savage vs Bret "The Hitman" Hart
First and foremost, fuck everything about Bret Hart's WCW theme. Kill it with acid. Rowdy Roddy Piper comes out after Bret, and apparently he's the referee! I love the nWo theme and everything, but Macho Man coming out to anything other than Pomp and Circumstance just feels wrong, no matter how cool he looks in the Wolfpac red and black. Bret and Piper have a shoving match early, as Savage dominates the action despite not doing anything special. Bret takes over now, but it's still just basic offense. Bret misses with the steel steps on the outside, then gets whipped into them by Macho Man. They brawl through the crowd, as Piper continues to yell that he'll let them fight. There's a major problem here, as there isn't a path through the crowd like they always had in WWF. So not only can they not really do anything in their brawl, the cameras can't distinguish them from the moshpit of fans they're stuck in.
It doesn't take long before they return from the crowd, probably realizing it was a bad idea. Bret goes after Macho Man's bad knee for the first time in the match with stomps and elbows. Tony Schiavone mentions that Scott Hall has just arrived to the building while Bret jumps on Macho Man's injured leg. Piper gets physical with Hart to pull him off Savage in the corner, but Bret just goes right back to dissecting the leg. Savage kicks out of a wicked piledriver, and Hart gets in Piper's face to complain about a slow count. Hart delays before going for the cover off a DDT, and Savage kicks out at two yet again. Bret goes up to, of course, Bret's rope, but nobody's home for the elbow drop.
Macho Man limps around, rallying with a snap suplex for two. He heads up top for the Macho Elbow, and connects! He grabs his knee and rolls around before pinning for a very close nearfall. Bret hits a headbutt to the gut and locks in the Sharpshooter. Miss Elizabeth runs out! This distraction helps Macho Man put in a Sharpshooter of his own! Bret is able to get to the ropes, as Elizabeth comes in and shoves Piper for whatever reason. Then, Savage comes over and shoves Piper for arguing with Elizabeth. Hart gets Savage with a low blow while Piper is dealing with Elizabeth, and clocks Piper. Macho Man confiscates a foreign object from Bret that he used to hit Piper, but Hollywood Hogan comes out and assaults Macho Man's knee!
Another Sharpshooter is applied, as Piper finds the foreign object in Savage's hand. Piper disqualifies him, and Bret Hart picks up the victory. This was a complete mess, and not a very entertaining one. Too much stuff that commentary didn't bother explaining, and just too much stuff in general.
WCW Tag Team Title Match - The Outsiders w/ Dusty Rhodes (c) vs Sting and The Giant
Not sure how they ended up here, but Sting is teaming with nWo Hollywood's Giant. Wolfpac attire, but no Wolfpac theme for Hall and Nash. Regardless, they are the coolest tag team ever. Hall cuts a promo, and the crowd pops when he goes "Hey, yo". He asks the fans if they're here to see Dubya See Dubya, and they boo. He then asks if they're here to see the nWo. They cheer loudly. It's weird that despite The Giant being heel and The Outsiders being babyfaces, they came out to the same entrance theme. The idea being played up at commentary is that should Giant and Sting win the titles, Sting will have to decide whether or not to join nWo Hollywood.
Hall starts in the ring with Sting, and Sting takes a toothpick to the face. Hall hits a decent Chokeslam, and stomps around like Frankenstein to mock The Giant on the apron. Nash comes in to stop the Scorpion Deathlock, and Sting beats up both Outsiders. Hall tags in Nash as a response to Sting tagging in The Giant, and they go at it. Nash gains the advantage on The Giant, and goes for a Jackknife that's countered. Nash continues to beat him down, though. A big corner clothesline and a boot by Giant, who then does the Hogan hand-to-ear taunt.
There's three faces in this match, so the crowd doesn't really know what to do when Sting's in the ring with one of The Outsiders. Sting gets clobbered with a big boot by Nash, who tags in Hall. Hall goes to work on Sting, and catches him out of a crossbody to connect with the Fallaway Slam. They continue to double team Sting, and Hall gives Giant the spooky fingers taunt. Nash crotch chops towards The Giant before beating on Sting in the corner, infuriating the big man on the outside. Hall puts Sting in an abdominal stretch and, as the heel in this situation, holds hands with Nash for leverage. Sting is stuck in the stretch for a LONG time, but counters out eventually with a hip toss followed by an elbow drop that doesn't hit.
Hall tags in Big Sexy, who drops Sting with a leaping Sidewalk Slam for two. Sting lunges towards his corner for the tag, but he's caught in a bear hug. After letting the arm drop twice, Sting gets out of the bear hug with headbutts and a forehead bite, tagging in The Giant. It is now that I realize that the booking seems backwards here, as babyface Sting makes the hot tag to the only heel in the whole match. Either way, The Giant pummels Big Kev, and hits him with a Hollywood Hogan leg drop for a nearfall. The Giant drops the strap on his singlet before heading up to the top rope. He leaps off with a Superfly Splash, but Nash is able to avoid it and Giant hits the mat with thunderous impact. Dusty slides one of the tag belts into the ring and goes to distract the referee, while Nash drops his own straps. Hall sneaks in the ring and grabs the belt Dusty left there, as Nash tries to hoist The Giant up for the Jackknife. Hall whacks Nash in the back with the belt, and Giant gets the three count!
Hall and Dusty go over to Giant and Sting to present them with the tag belts, as Hall has appeared to join nWo Hollywood. Sting doesn't move from the apron, staring a death gaze at Hall and The Giant with the tag belt resting on his shoulder, unsure what to make of the situation presented before him. The match was formulaic but in a good way, and it's always cool to see the tag belts main eventing a PPV. Maybe it's just me being jaded about WCW though, but I totally saw this swerve coming. There was no way a WCW PPV was ending with a clean finish.
Overall, the show was enjoyable and had a couple memorable moments. Outside of the Luger match, there's nothing I can point to and say to definitely avoid no matter what, but outside of Eddy/Ultimo there's also nothing I would really recommend as a must-watch. However, there was a lot more good than bad. There's a lot worse ways to spend three hours.
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